On May 6th “The Car” was re-released on DVD and even though it’s not as well made as other satanically themed 70’s films like “The Exorcist” or “The Omen” it does have something they don’t: Satan coming to Earth in the guise of a black two door coupe and terrorizing a small desert town in Utah.

Holy shit, can you even imagine how high the people who greenlit this must have been? It’s the ultimate retarded mixing of two popular genres: films about Satan and films about cars. (As a matter of fact both “Smokey & The Bandit” and “The Car” were distributed by Universal Studios and both were released within a week of each other.) As silly as it sounds though, everything is played totally straight, which is the perfect tone for the film and what helps it be more than just a dumb cult flick. It's easy to turn something like this into a parody, much harder to convince the audience of its authenticity. The car was directed by Elliot Silverstein, the same guy who did Cat Ballou and A Man Called Horse. The score is by Leonard Rosenman, who did won an Academy Award for his work in Barry Lyndon. The screenplay is written by two of the same guys who also wrote “The Gauntlet” and “Pale Rider”. Lastly, it stars James Brolin as the local Sherrif who has to deal with the destruction caused by the automobile from Hell. Brolin at the time was riding at what was arguably the height of his career. He’d just ended Marcus Welby M.D., had been in the uber-successful Westworld and was just about to make “Capricorn One” and “The Amityville Horror”.

Hey, on paper it works! It’s not quite as good in practice, but meh… it’s still a more than worthwhile way to spend two hours of your life.

Apparently it's been remastered, which is rather pointless since it's a 1970's drive in horror movie set in the Utah desert; lots of tans and oranges and yellows with the occasional yellow-orange tan color to spice things up a bit. If anything the previous releases’ grit and imperfections on the negative gave it a cool “Grindhouse” look. Extras? Um, do subtitles count? Unless I'm mistaken, and I've looked on iMDB and Amazon for info, there's nothing here not even a trailer.  So, as much as I hate to say it, don't buy the new DVD because 14.99$ is way too goddamn much for just the fucking film no matter how incredibly neat it is. For five dollars less you could have either the collector's edition of Duel or the special edition of Christine; both of which are loaded with extras and will fulfill any “evil car” needs. Shame on Universal for giving us such a crap presentation.

I’m really bummed that I can’t quite recommend this release since “The Car” is one of those movies that fans of 70's cinema should see. I love this film. If for no other reason than because I admire its massive titanium balls. There's just something about a movie that takes itself seriously while totally eschewing realism that makes it admirable. Too many modern films today try to be “real”, and in doing so fail because they paint themselves into a literary corner that’s impossible to get out of unless you admit to yourself that all fiction is by its very nature highly improbable, so you might as well just take the hit, write the scene even though you know it couldn’t possibly happen, and hope the audience doesn’t notice. There’s no other way.

I already have the car on VHS and see no real reason to buy it on DVD right now and this new thing has not convinced me in the least. Maybe one day when the tape breaks, I dunno.

So what's my final word? Well, if you've never seen this, you gotta see it. How ca you carry a coherent conversation about James Brolin, amazing beards, and/or 70's satanic movies without ever having your mind raped by The Car?

My advice? Either rent or try to find a nice used Anchor Bay VHS or DVD release on eBay. That'd be easier on your wallet and have equally nonexistent extras while looking appropriately grittier to boot. Not to mention that Car is one of those films that you really really enjoy, but only in small doses. So even if it's a must see, it's not a must own.

One last thing: SPACED is coming to Region 1 DVD! If you haven't seen it, what the fuck are you doing reading Film Treat you twats? It's basically Shaun of the Dead without zombies and with a Three's Company vibe. Having grown up watching British TV comedies on PBS like Red Dwarf, Fawlty Towers, Flying Circus, Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy (the TV miniseries, not the surprisingly good but not very British at all film) Young Ones and Bottom, I dug it a lot. It's an extension of those while being its own thing. If you've never seen it, well call me Recommendy McFagface because I'm recommending that you watch it. I watched all 24 episodes in one sitting and by the end was totally won over by the show. The R1 box set (coming out July 22nd) will have a new commentary by Edgar Wright, Simon Pegg, and Jessica Hynes with special guests Quentin Tarantino, Kevin Smith, Bill Hader, Matt Stone, Patton Oswalt, and Diablo Cody. (Diablo Cody???) along with the extras (Original commentaries, the “Skip to the End” documentary, outtakes, deleted scenes, and raw footage) from the Region 2 release.

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Jesus, sometimes I think the studio people and investors are as retarded as some filmgoers. Did anyone REALLY think Speed Racer was going to make money? Anyone here? Anyone in Hollywood? Anyone in the WORLD?????? It's an overly bright, noisy film that looks like it was edited by a masturbating chimp on meth. I've only seen the trailer and already it's grating on my fucking nerves.

Yeah, I can't judge it without having seen the whole thing, but what I've seen ain't good, the reviews I've read ain't good, and the news of it making it only half of what it was expected to make REALLY ain't good.

There's just something about way too brightly colored films that take place in a totally unrealistic impossible universe that almost automatically makes them fail. Look at “Dick Tracy” or “Toys”, both of these are kind of cult films now but they never had much of a chance to be huge box office successes. They're just bizarre misfires from people who should have known better. Sometimes it CAN work, just look at Pee-Wee's Big Adventure, but that's only because Paul Rubens really had nailed down his Pee-Wee persona by then and was able to inject a lot of humor and humanity into the character. So you believed in him, and by extension the movie. Also, as creepy as it may be to say, Rubens had some really keen insight into the mind of children. So the whole movie felt like a daydream you may have had when you were 10 as opposed to being shown what adults thought you wanted to see.

Somehow I doubt the Wachowski's possess Ruben's umm… abilities. This looks like a wet firecracker.

Still, maybe I've got it all wrong. Who knows? Good luck guys, you may need all you can get.

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Since “Donnie Darko” seems to be the only good thing Richard Kelly has ever brought us on film (”Southland Tales”… my god the horror, but I thought “Domino” was cheesy neo-grindhouse at its finest), it's bittersweet to pop in the DVD to this masterpiece and realize that he blew his load on this one flick.

Now word from IGN UK has come that there will be a sequel.

Called “S. Darko.”

And it will revolve around that insignificant character in the movie, his baby sister Samantha last seen dancing with Sparkle Motion to “Notorious.” Apparently anxiously trying to convince us that every element of the story was relevant, a brand new crew will try to pull a story from thin air and expand on it.

See my original suspicion was that she was significant only in the notion that she'd fallen prey to the conformist yuppy population that had engulfed her and turned her into another faceless pageant child, doomed to clash with her unique brother if he'd survived, but then, what do I know?

“Picking up seven years after the original, the plot will follow Donnie's sister Samantha on a road trip to Los Angeles, during which she is plagued by a series of bizarre visions.”

This is looking to be a very in-name-only sequel, with a broad plot feeling like a mixture of “Stir of Echoes” and “Final Destination,” so all hopes of social undertones and existentialist musings perfected in the first film most likely will be nowhere to be found. I smell a PG-13 romp for the teens!
Not that Daveigh Chase is a terrible actress but as a fan of the original film, I just couldn't believe my eyes and ears. Damn Hollywood. I am holding out no hope for this.

It's just so fucking embarrassing.

“Sometimes I doubt your commitment to Sparkle Motion!”

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